Thursday, August 25, 2005

I'm Making Do

Its not easy to be myself. The parental answer to social concern, "Just be yourself". Am I fulfilling my nature? I sit in front of a computer screen all day, in a dark room with headphones on, communicating with text messages to the guy right behind me. I'm plugged in, processing logic problems. Does what we do for work have any relation to who we are and who we're trying to be? The who is always me - we always trying to be more ourselves. The stoics would add that nothing outside yourself can keep you from fulfilling your nature, only you can diminish yourself. Plato might point to a perfect image of ourselves that we are always striving for. The Christian chruch would point away from ourselves and to another, they are striving to be someone else. Although in christian thought a person receives a new nature when they are saved, and so they could still be striving to be themselves, their new selves. Modern liberals seem to strive to be a good person, a shifting image composed of popular thought and modern sensibilities of social responsibility. Still others seem to have a hikers mentality, "leave no trace", seeming to want to cause no harm and avoid harm. Like I said, Its not easy being yourself. Maybe the perspective should be reversed - our natures are trying to grow in rocky soil, and we're always trying to clear the way so some thread within us can be healthier and more vibrant. Always fighting to give it more sun, water, and good soil, all the time in shadow, dry and a little hungry. Human condition? Nothing universally new here, except for the individual, its always new, personal and desperately important. I prefer the stoic lightly mixed with an enlightened christian view, but its like a tool designed for a different job, but I'm making do.

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