Monday, October 27, 2008

Silent Days

There are days
that start out spent:
will wrung from cloth
taps barely dripping
pennies carefully counted
before we are on our way

There are days
when life holds no appeal:
minds full of must,
should, need and duty
and far too little
want, wonder and might.

There are days
we simply survive:
Crawling times, possibly
flavoring the future sweeter
but this sugar is for tomorrow
today remains bitter.

There are days
we suffer to pass:
Hope and future sweetness
alone, make living more
appealing than not.

There are days
when the wisest
among us wait
in near silence.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Waiting to be Spent

Bullets wait to be shot.
Knives wait to drink.
Potential energy
waits to become kinetic,
Just like some of us,
waiting to be spent.

Monday, October 13, 2008

On Becoming Stronger

Abstinence is the weakest form of discipline
Obedience is the most rigid form of leadership

Weak discipline wavers under repetitive stress
Rigid leadership snaps under uncertainty
-

Strength resides in moderation and flexibility,
Of course too much of either is less of the other,
so balance in moderation and flexibility are essential.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Meaningful to Us

None of it
was that big of a deal:
We were smart,
educated kids with
addictive personalities,
and few internal constraints.
We were more than
we were ready for
and we loved it.
Everything was deep
and meaningful, new
and full of fresh insight,
or at least, that's
how it felt to us.

We thought we had something
the world was waiting for.

It was fun and dangerous
and not really that big
of a deal.
Not really,
but it was meaningful to us.

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Scars that still itch on occasion

I clearly remember
how I felt on the inside,
the struggle against and the
abandon to.
I can easily recall
how you felt to the touch
thighs, hands, hair
lips, forehead
and there are times
when your smell rushes at me
and my nose is full of you
and my brain reels with
unexpected memory.
How is it that connections
remain from such physical memory
when all other connections are
long dead and cold.

Monday, October 06, 2008

Live From New York its...

I've been practicing
in front of the mirror
with a microphone so I can play it back.
I don't know what the opening skit will be
but I practice the part I know I'll have:
The guest host always introduces the show.
I figure if I practice for a few months,
get it down pat, then I'll be ready
when my time comes.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Snake Oil

Church is a solution looking for a problem.
-

Religion is a topical ointment for an internal imbalance that we've been able to cure with a pill for centuries.
-

Religion is an ointment pinning all claims to effectiveness on the placebo effect.

Wait for the report

Shot glass splashed with tequila
full and dripping onto the wooden bar
worn with scrubbing and dried out by
alcohol, hard as a rock.
It rests, waits, impatient
wants to be thrown back, shot
and slammed back down on the bar
loud report, bam, didn't even
need lime
fuck salt
straight shot.

That is how I feel some days;
patient anger dripping onto the bar
waiting for the report
fuck limes and salt
I'll take my future neat.

Refugee Stress

I cry like a refugee.

If you watch me closely
these moments would seem random.

My eyes tears-up, and
speech is briefly impaired
as I stifle vocal symptoms
usually with success.

The phenomenon is largely internal
occurs several times a week
and anything could trigger it
can't see it coming
because there is no obvious causal link
until it occurs
even then it doesn't always make sense.

Working theory:
Symptom of too much stress experienced for too long
too much control of thought and emotions
too much change too fast
its like leakage
stress fractures in the hull
need to be taken out of service
for some repairs and
fresh paint.